Core 4

I would like to register a complaint

I do not approve of people posting stories like this Core Four story over several days instead of in one complete burst the way the god of all high-on-magic foursome smut stories intended.

I intend to write a stern letter to the management. Who manages squid? Octopi? Cuttlefish?

Note also that it's a complete lie that it doesn't have character development. I hate authors who lie about stuff in their notes! Hate! HATE. Only posting complete stories could possibly move me to forgive.
  • Current Music: into the fourth dimension : The Orb : Adventures in the ultraworld
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Great. Now I'm having this really bizarre image.

*ring, ring*

(phone is picked up)

Complaints department, Head Cuttlefish speaking?

And in conclusion I'm not going to even attempt to read it until it's done. So there.
Okay. You killed me. I'm going to answer my phone "head cuttlefish speaking" all day. Mr Pedia will be hopelessly confuzzled.
I wholeheartedly support this protest! Maybe we can get a class action going? Because this sort of lazy-ass "I'll post it over WEEKS ::evil squid laugh::" should be discouraged.

Maybe by spanking.
I clicked just to see what you were on about and-- wow. what a story. what a story to leave hanging like that.

hobgoblinn registers her agreement in your disapproval. How am I going to find any time to write if I'm having to go find the latest installment of this over the next few days?
I am resolutely setting it out of my mind now so that I can concentrate on my plotty little story about caves and magic. Yowza, though. Yowza.
See but if it had been written all at once I would be a big pile of goo and get nothing done, this way I can be a big soggy mess that is pretending to read (if not understand)marxist-feminist theory

Management thanks you for your communication. Your concerns are important to us.

We have looked into the matters you raised, and we are addressing them accordingly:

1. The god of all high-on-magic foursome smut stories is currently on probation, due to the woefully inadequate job S/He is doing in inspiring such stories. We are seeking to employ a new god, who will, in accordance with sacrificial agreements, provide a never-ending supply of pornsome foursomes.

2. The multiple-day posting was an approach required in order to meet product launch deadlines. In layman's terms, the Xander-fucking was utterly lame as of the original post-date, and it was necessary to either delay the entire product, or break it into stages.

3. Staged launch of the product allowed the incorporation of customer feedback, such as your own review of part two, to be retroactively utilised for late-stage product improvements.

4. Early beta testing determined that 13 000 words of porn in single portions surpassed the 'titillating' marketshare we were aiming for, and instead cornered the somewhat less profitable 'tedious as hell' demographic.

5. We are disappointed by your suggestion that we provided character development contrary to package information. While we are proud to provide a delicate balance of flavours and textures, we stand by our assertion that all characters contained in our tasty product have fully settled before shipping.

Thank you for your interest. We hope you continue to enjoy our Squidlove range.

Yours faithfully,
Head Cuttlefish.